I know, I know! It is blank, and I am awful, and I haven't even told y'all about Christmas, or New Year's, or whether Bo got his virgins (no) or anything else in the world that is important, but I've been out of town for forEVER doing an investigation. And I'm about to head out again, but this time it is only for a day, so we are glad.
I've been working on an entry about all the festivities, and I will have it up just as soon as I can, but I didn't want y'all to think I'd up and died or something. And then I had this really strange dream last night where my whole website caught some crazy artificial-life internet virus and took on a personality all its own, and entries started showing up that I hadn't even written, and in those entries I was portrayed as sort of a mix of Joan Collins and Che Guevara (i.e., a revolutionary bitch). And it was very perplexing to me. As it would have been to anyone, really.
In addition to the investigation, I have also been trying really hard to figure out how to edit a video from our New Year's Eve party. This video is hugely entertaining to me, but I think it is maybe a little bit hard to hear, so I thought, "Well, I will just add captions to this video, which will not be hard, and then I will post it on my site and it will continue to be hugely entertaining to me, while only vaguely entertaining to others, but, hey." Only, that sentence there is evidently the height of folly, because "adding captions to mpg" has turned out to be the most complicated endeavor ever attempted by modern man, on par with air traffic control and dismantling a nuclear warhead. So, one of these days maybe I will figure it out and then we can all witness the climax of our New Year's Eve festivities, which involved (1) fire (2) the breaking of several laws, ordinances and moral codes, including the golden rule of "give a hoot, don't pollute" (but, we only sort of accidentally polluted! Don't tell...Smoky the Bear? I forget which animal enforces that particular rule. Is it an owl? Is it the same owl from the Tootsie Roll commercial? You know, the owl with the mortar board and...glasses, I think? Is that the polluting owl? If it isn't, do you think they are related? Do you think I should move on and not think so much about cartoon owls?) and (3) the Ride of the Valkyries, on a boom box, God help us all.
So, that is that, and now I am off for extended investigation fun. Y'all have a good afternoon, and if Che Guevara, Joan Collins, or a woodland creature wearing a park ranger's hat comes looking for me, please tell them I moved to Finland. To ride with those Valkyries.